Happiness: How to Be Happy
We often don’t know what makes us happy and so we are often in captivity in our current life circumstances and diseases. We are unhappy and at the same time we have no direction to point us toward these feelings of happiness and contentedness.
From the holistic point of view, I regard feelings of happiness and contentedness as one of the most important basics for our health and the quality of our lives. This article aims to show you how not to be in the captivity of your life circumstances, but also how to assume control over your life, how to give it direction, and mainly how to be happy.
1. Become Aware of Yourselves
Western civilization focuses mainly on the improvement of its environment and on conquering nature. So it is no wonder that we focus our attention on things around us too. We are dismissive towards our own bodies and minds.
We are the prisoners of information and requirements that arise not from our hearts, but from our environment. Even just simply living in today’s society seems to be unbelievably hard and puts many requirements upon us.
So it can easily happen that we will achieve a good way of living or find success in our work, but our own lives will escape us. If we let the modern way of living consume us, we will mainly be satisfying other people’s needs and the needs of our own egos. We pay attention to the world around us and the needs of our body, mind, and soul are in the background.
We often make bad decisions when it comes to satisfying our needs. But our body is very smart and usually warns us. This could mean, for example, feelings of tiredness, moroseness, or sickness. We consider these warning signs as obstacles for which we have no time. After all, we know what is best for us!
But I have to let you down here.
Nobody is smarter than his own body. Our body does many of its processes independently from our mind and we are just the driver. And if the driver veers off course, he is warned by the body in time. That is why it is necessary to pay attention to the warning signs from your body.
Stop gathering information from outside yourself… Start listening to your body and turn attention towards your heart.
Become aware of yourselves. Become aware of your own needs and fulfill them.
Ask yourselves what it means to be happy. And work on that.
To be able to define real happiness is not easy at all. Therefore I will try to explain my view on what brings real happiness and how to be happy below.
2. Strive for Good Health
I used to feel miserable in my life. Diseases were taking my strength, optimism, and will to live. Over the years I have realized that it is not material possessions but mainly the feelings of health and strength that are the basis for real happiness. And this applies the other way around as well – whether we are happy or not significantly influences our health. (1) Feelings of healthiness and happiness are connected.
Try to maintain your health. If you are sick, do everything in order to heal yourself. Realize that without health, your life will have no value. And not even work success, a higher salary, a luxury car, or a chest full of gold will change this.
So how do you maintain your health? And how do you get rid of disease?
You have many options to try. I myself try to use a holistic approach towards human health. Apart from information on this page, you can also delve into other fields of human health, such as:
3. Approach Your Problems with a Detached View
Short term feelings of happiness can be reached relatively easily. It will often feel like enough to please ourselves, like if we buy something new or experience something new. But this feeling of happiness goes away very quickly. Everyday problems come in. We turn our attention towards these problems and try to solve them. We expect that after we solve these problems, the feelings of happiness will come back again.
If you are living a similar scenario, you will probably not reach long-term feelings of happiness. There are two reasons for this:
- We associate feelings of happiness with problems.
- You consider things as problems, when these things are not actually problems.
Let’s take this apart step by step. Problems are and will be here. We need to make peace with the fact that whatever we do, obstacles will always be here. And if we keep connecting our own feelings of happiness to our obstacles and problems, we will logically be always unhappy. That is why we should be trying to prevent a connection between our problems and our feelings of happiness. What will help here is to keep distance from our problems and to reduce their occurrence.
So now think, when is it a real problem and when not?
For some people, it is not a problem when they have few possessions. But for other people, it is unimaginable to lose even a few dollars from their fat bank accounts. So a problem is really only something that we consider a problem. What we wish to be a problem will become a problem. We must reach the conclusion that we are actually the creators of our own problems.
I know, this doesn’t sound good.
But I only wish to point out that we can solve many of our problems through this realization. It is enough to realize what a real problem is for us and what is not. And the more we turn our attention toward what’s inside us, the more some of these problems will start feeling petty and will start disappearing. People like to make things more complicated than they actually are in reality, which is what the next video is about.
You can remove many of your problems on your road to happiness by simply ceasing consideration of them as problems. And if some of these problems remain, just accept their existence. Consider problems as a natural part of your life, try to understand their meaning, and learn by overcoming them.
4. Remove Stress and Tension
Unfortunately, stress is considered a normal part of life nowadays. We can experience stress daily in our work, on vacation, but also at home. We should try to remove stress from our lives, or at least limit it as much as possible. Excessive or long-term stress can cause health issues, such as: (2, 3)
- high blood pressure,
- heart disease,
- depression or anxiety,
- acne or eczema,
- menstrual problems,
- suppression of immune, digestive, sleep, and reproductive systems.
So if you find yourself under permanent stress, don’t just slow down, shut it down completely. Realize that being stressed all the time keeps you from your happiness. And what’s more, stressful states strongly undermine your efforts to heal and regenerate.
And why does stress actually affect our health?
Stress strongly acidifies the organism and disrupts the acid-base balance within our bodies. The result of this disruption is body dysfunctions and diseases.
How do we remove stress?
The best way to remove stress is to remove the stressor – the source of stress – be it work or a problematic partner. Don’t forget that your life will have no value without health. But there are situations when you can’t remove the source of stress. In this case, it is necessary to at least try to learn to handle stress in a better way (I am preparing an article about this topic).
5. Get Rid of Fears, Anxieties, and Depressions
Excessive stress and feelings of tension can grow into feelings of fear and anxiety. It is important to realize that all of these feelings are actually defense mechanisms that our bodies naturally have. The purpose of fear and anxiety is to encourage the body in times of danger and to allow for immediate reactions. (4) So these feeling are not bad per se.
Just like stress and tension, fear and anxiety also acidify our organism and disrupt the natural balance in our bodies. So it is bad if these feeling constantly repeat and burden our bodies too much.
To find your happiness, get rid of unnecessary fears and anxieties. Leave these fears for situations when they are really needed. Take over responsibility for everything that is happening in your life and be strong! Nobody else, only you, is the creator of your life. When you realize this, you will do things as best you can, and you will get rid of fears and anxieties.
Anxiety, Depression, and Panic
It can happen that our body and brain will evaluate our own lifestyle as dangerous. This is nothing out of the ordinary, considering how we live sometimes and how we think about our lives. In these cases, our body tries to protect us and starts a defense reaction in which we can regularly experience feelings of tension, fear, and anxiety. The body then waits for a moment when we will start acting correctly and will be able to shut its defense reaction down.
The sad thing is that instead of changing something in the way we eat or in our approach toward ourselves, we instead visit a psychiatrist, who leaves us with anti-depressants, or sleeping pills, or sedatives. This case can be compared to going to a car service with a warning light blinking on your dashboard.
The mechanic (psychiatrist) will take a look at your car and solve the issue by cutting the wire leading to the warning light.
Is this a solution? I don’t think so.
The issues remain, because we have only suppressed their signals, and now we can continue living on, with nothing having changed. If somebody did this to your car, you would probably report him to the police right away. But when it comes to anti-depressants and sedatives, we say “thank you”, we pay, and we leave with the feeling that we have been taken care of. I am not saying that there aren’t situations where antidepressants and sedatives could help. I am simply saying that they are being overused.
Do you want to try a different solution?
Great. A possible natural solution for a bad psychological state is to put up some effort and work on your health in a holistic manner. Don’t blame just the psyche! Our psyche also just reflects the state and condition of our body.
6. Surround Yourself with People, Who Will Make You Feel Good
As Aristotle said, the human is a social being. Good social connections and strong relationships are important factors that influence our happiness and health. (5)
It is important to remember that the quantity of relationships is not important; it is the quality of these relationships that counts. Surround yourself with people with whom you have an honest, nice relationship and work on these relationships persistently. According to an unique Harvard study, people who are more socially connected are happier, healthier, and live longer. (6)
7. Accept and Give Love
Each of us understands the world in a different way. One of the many views is that love is the basis of everything. Love is the source, energy, and light.
Allow me to quote a few extracts from a letter, which Albert Einstein wrote for his daughter: (7)
“It is a force that includes and governs all others.”
“This universal force is LOVE.”
“Love is the light that enlightens those who give and receive it.”
“For love we live and die.”
“Love is God and God is Love.”
The fact that this was written by one of the most important scientists of our time already says quite a lot. I think that love really can do anything, be it healing or reconciliation between nations. Love can be the key to everything.
If you don’t have enough love or you have nobody to give love to, change it. It is possible that these deficits influence, or maybe even cause, your situation. It is important not to only receive love, but to also give it. Learn to love.
Because love is the strongest source of happiness.
8. Do Things Because You Want To
I remember well that I used to have a feeling that I was doing things that I actually didn’t want to be doing. As for most of us, I used to have this feeling in school. But it didn’t end with school: I used to have this feeling of forced fulfillment of obligations through most of my days. At work, outside, or even at home. Most of the activities were simply bothering me. And that was sapping me of my life energy.
Only after the moment when I decisively confronted my worries and health issues did I realize one thing. I realized that these feelings are not the fault of these individual activities, but rather of my own attitude towards these activities.
I realized that in every situation I am the captain of my life. If I do anything, I will be the one making the decision. And in the end, it is me again who bears the full responsibility for all of his actions and decisions.
In the moment when we deliberately take full responsibility for our own existence and our actions, we will find out that we suddenly don’t have to look for excuses. The activities of everyday life will not bother us and make us angry that much. Of course, some activities are less pleasant. But it is sufficient to realize why we are doing these activities and that they have a certain reason and meaning.
To have the feeling of happiness and contentedness, you must be convinced that the things you do have a meaning. And if they don’t, then simply stop doing them or try to find a meaning for them. Suddenly, you will find yourself doing many unpleasant activities because you want to – because they suddenly have their meaning because they are helping you achieve your goals. Focus on the fact that you actually want to do the action and realize its meaning. You will be happier.
9. Live in the Present Moment
With all the rush and all our worries, we often forget about what is really important, and that is the present moment. We are always focusing on what is awaiting us in the future or we are recalling memories from the past. The magic of the present moment is shadowed and uninteresting. We take the present time for granted and we don’t pay attention to it.
A significant part of the day is spent outside reality, fixed on computers, TVs, tablets, and smartphones, and children today don’t know how to function any other way. We only pay attention to the world around us when we have a reason for it, like when somebody disturbs us or we have to arrange something. After dealing with these disruptive elements, we immediately go back to our virtual reality or to our thoughts.
Aren’t we missing something?
Yes, we are. Our lives.
So it is no wonder that we are feeling unhappy or that we feel that we are living a life we don’t want to. As Dan Millman says:
What time is it? Now.
What are you? This moment.”
Have your experience, plans for the future, and use different pieces of technology for your work. But don’t forget to turn your attention towards yourself, your heart, and towards the present moment. It has been scientifically proven that living in the moment makes people happier. (8) So try to live every moment fully. Throw away unnecessary thoughts and you will be surprised how the normal world around us is beautiful and rich.
10. Do Everything as Best You Can
Come closer to your happiness by doing everything as best you can. If you manage this step, you will never find yourself regretting things.
Yes, it is always possible to do something better.
But if you have done your maximum for a certain thing, you will not have any regrets, because you will know that under these circumstances you couldn’t have done more.
And a life without remorse is much happier.
11. Work on Your Happiness. Step by step.
There are really only a few books that are as inspiring as the Way of the Peaceful Warrior. I can only agree that happiness is brought to us by our own life paths. It is not a state of mind, achieved by fulfilling all of our wishes or by removing our worries. Happiness is a state of mind that is created by having a direction and a way that fulfills us and make us happy.
Whatever you may base your happiness on, work on these basics slowly and regularly. People often make the mistake of setting huge goals and working on them with great effort. (9) But not every day is as great as the first one, and these efforts usually fade sooner or later.
So do not try to achieve a feeling of happiness right away. Feel free to set lower goals and make them more concrete with time. View the achievement of a long-term feeling of happiness as a gradual process, where persistence is what will bring you your happiness.
Let’s summarize everything. The basis of happiness is that it is a state of mind which we have to work on. We can start our road to happiness right now, but we don’t have to rush anywhere. As the first step, it is good to become aware of ourselves and to start listening to our hearts. Then we can start to dedicate ourselves to other areas, such as stress removal, establishing harmonious relationships, etc.
Happiness definitely influences our health, and it is one of the basics of the holistic approach towards health. But it can be hard to achieve the feeling of happiness, especially when we are currently suffering in our lives and we are sick. In such cases, it is important to pay attention to the other principles of human health that are connected to happiness and contentedness as well.
I firmly believe that the principles listed on these sites will help you to find your happiness. And now let’s get to it!